wake up.

Jack Tait sat on his shitty couch in a shitty town drinking shitty beer and shitty wine.  he listened to Bruce Springsteen and reminisced about the good times he once had.  the free times.  the lively times.  the fun times.  the drunken times.  the times of sexual debauchery.  times when he was free to do and be who he wanted to be.  not pulled down by depressed women with depressing lives but unwilling to do anything about it or refusing to do anything about it.
Jack was stuck.  he no longer knew what to do.  he held on to the notion of love and marriage but it was not holding onto him any longer.  he would rather be fucking twenty-one year old girls with no attachment and no bitterness.  girls who still had dreams and still had excitement.  who wanted to get fucked and wanted to get fucked hard.  life had yet beat them down the way it had beaten down Jack’s wife and many other well intentioned women.
Jack wanted out but he knew that he could never leave his beautiful, innocent daughter of ten years.  the true love of his life.  his true inspiration.  he was worried for Taylor as she clung to Sarah’s side.  he was worried that she was watching too many shitty shows that her Mommy watched.  he was worried that she was eating too much shitty food that her Mommy ate.  he was worried that she wasn’t living life to it’s fullest the way that her Mommy wasn’t living life to it’s fullest.  LIFE WAS MEANT FOR LIVING.  NOT FOR HIDING IN YOUR SHITTY HOUSE IN SHITTY ORANGEVILLE.  dull parents passing on dull ideologies to their kids and thinking that everything is okay.  wasted lives that do not need to be wasted if only they would all look in the mirror and make changes. but many people refuse to look in the mirror and  change.  they prefer to eat McDonald’s and watch The Kardashian’s.  Life whizzing by day by dreary day and Jack Tait needed out. 
He sat on his couch and pondered.  he sat on his couch and he drank.  he sat on his couch and he masturbated.  he sat on his couch and passed out.
The next day came and all was good again.  coffee.  news.  cycle.  read.  eat breakfast.  give Taylor a kiss.  get yelled at by Sarah.  silent treatment later.  “Just go.  We are happier without you Jack.”  Sarah spoke these same words loudly and she spoke them often.  then she posted pics on facebook of Jack and the family eating lunch at Johnny’s Burgers.  She then told Jack that they should look for houses in old Orangeville.  she also said that they should get a new car.  she said that they should go away to Mexico at Christmas.  then she said that Jack should leave.  “we are happier without you Jack.  You are a basket case.  what would you do without us?  You are a loser Jack.  C’mon Taylor, let’s leave Daddy alone drinking wine.  let’s go up and watch a movie.”  and with that Sarah angrily brought Taylor upstairs to watch a movie leaving Taylor’s Daddy alone on the shitty couch drinking shitty wine in the shitty town.  Before she went upstairs Taylor looked back at Jack with a look of love…and sadness.  Jack looked at Taylor with a look of love…and defeat.  Little kids always being thrown into the lives of depressed and angry parents that are incapable of love and incapable of looking in the mirror.  parents that waste their lives away and then waste their kids lives away.  a bunch of sad depressed ladies still looking for the perfect man that they see in shitty Hollywood movies.
phony shitty depressed dull and getting old.  worse than the wrinkles is the depression.  depression brought about by nothing lives.  no dreams.  no goals.  no love.  no humanity.  no family.  no hope.
sad.
dull.
lost.
unaware.
incapable of fun.
angry.
confused.
life.