I don’t know where to start. where to begin. so many happenings and so much emotion combined with so much clutter and so little good conversation. a society built on facebook “likes” and Instagram followers. a sick society that is run by phony people in phony clothes with phony smiles and phony gatherings. a society that applauds the phony but looks down on the real and judges them with their beady little eyes and small and sad hearts. a society filled with “rip” posts but the posts made to enhance their following and enhance their “brand”. empathy long gone and replaced with ego and narcissism.
many so-called actors taking selfies on the Danforth after the horrific shooting last week. taking selfies and using hashtags of Danforth Strong but only wanting accolades. posing in their typical sexual way and receiving typical comments from the followers. the followers always making comments about how hot they are or how sexy they look. such pathetic phonies but the phonies easily fooling other phonies as our world continues to get beaten down by useless politicians and useless fake artists. fake politicians. fake actors. fake filmmakers. fake friends. fake parents. everything fake but the fake (sheep) ruling while the real artists continue to suffer with feelings. real feeling and real empathy. such sheep. such pathetic sheep.
onto my next rant. my next issue. which is almost the same rant. the same issue. “selfies”. what the fuck is the point of taking a selfie? who started this phenomenon? why? what purpose does the selfie do? and even more pathetic than the selfie is the bikini selfie with some sort of sexual look on their faces. what the fuck are these girls trying to accomplish? in a world filled with #metoo complaints and issues what would possess these girls to strip down and pose for their own picture? their own sexual picture. their sexual picture that gets 400 likes and 100 comments of, “HAWT” and “OMG you are so gorg”. fake comments by fake girls setting back their #metoo movement into a movement of hypocrisy. a movement of attention. a movement of confusion. and why do we not call out this type of behaviour? seemingly complete and utter narcissism that gets applauded instead of scolded. maybe I should have more empathy. be more empathetic. maybe girls don’t know any better. maybe society has forced them to take these half naked pics of themselves. but why do many girls NOT feel the need to get attention from sexual pics but so many others do? and why not “call out” this narcissistic behaviour instead of “like” and applaud it? the hypocrisy of our society. the phoniness of our society. the dullness of our society.
death. life. it comes and goes way too fast. way too soon. love fleeting. being replaced by phones and bad tv. bad movies. bad music. life. death. wrinkles coming. hair going. conversations wanting but never happening. snippets of banter on social media replacing meaningful conversations about the world. about life. people dying in horrific ways but society and it’s sheep using the deaths as tools to further their name. their brand. sad individuals. sad. lonely. insecure. shameful. shameful behaviour that gets applauded. applauded by the sheep but the sheep end up being meaningless in the grand scale of life.
follow your heart and follow your soul. avoid the fake and phony as much as possible although it is becoming harder to do. they are everywhere and dressed in all kinds of different clothing.
love. always love. but do not be shamed. do not be shamed into silence. into stillness. provoke. challenge. reach out. reach out with a big heart and a big soul. reach. reach. reach. preach. preach. preach. love. love. love. breathe. breathe. breathe. fight. fight. fight.
another day about to end. any relevance to this fine day? I ponder the question. check my facebook. scroll my Instagram. images. images. images. confusion. blurry. blurred lines and nifty nooks. yoga helping but today was a struggle. busy mind. restless soul. calm down and feel.
feel.
what is life for?
what is my purpose?
what is my destiny?
what is my future?
what does it all mean?
less friends and fewer conversation.
why?
me?
them?
her?
still looking for fun.
I knew the answer when I was twenty-five. even thirty. but now? what is fun for me now? what? what? what?
I down another bottle of wine and decide it is time for bed. my wife and daughter long gone and deep into their sleep. I turn off the lights and check outside for burglars. none. I lock the door and walk upstairs to my lonely bed. I turn off the light and pull up the covers. I used to pray but now that gets in the way so I don’t. my back hurts but so does my knee and both wrists. I turn onto my left side and throw my left arm out to the side but my left shoulder is in pain. why I do not know. old injuries. old bed. old man.
old.
lonely.
seeking connection.
connection hard to find.
narcissistic world filled with narcissists and phonies.
breathe. allow. accept. do. be. create.
always create.
“don’t let the bastards drag you down.”
notanotherphony. 