normal?

another long day at work. soooo tired. soooo sore. throat scratchy. eyes blurry. glasses on. glasses off. glasses on. glasses off. sore throat. scratchy throat. no booze tonight. need one day off. maybe i’ll feel better tomorrow. no booze. no run. no shit. no fuck. no money. no hope? no fun. gratitude?

now i understand HUMP DAY. eight. nine. ten. eleven. twelve hours a day in a shitty job for shitty pay. stuck in brutal traffic. eating shitty fast food. no exercise. no life. no friends. no fun. no excitement. lost in life. lost in misery. lost in surrender. surrendering to a fake god. a fake dad. a fake life. a fake boss. a fake premier. a fake prime minister. the daily grind in a dull life. retirement party? why? wasting week after week and year after year in a job that you hate for a boss that doesn’t even know you. nor care for you.

HAPPY HUMP DAY.

TGIF.

fucking life.

fucking rules.

fucking religions.

fucking bosses.

fucking leaders.

how do you get out of hell?

how do you have a positive mindset?

how do you get a good job?

how do you make good connections?

how do you get help?

down and troubled and needing love. needing care.

every single part of my body is sore.

every single part of my body is tired.

AM I SICK?

AM I TIRED?

AM I SICK AND TIRED?

depressed?

truthful?

bipolar?

normal?

living someone else’s life?

alive and dead.

alive and kicking.

wanted dead or alive.

focus on what brings me joy.

tired.

tired.

tired.

how are you supposed to live a vibrant life when you are always tired and always beaten up? always tired and always beaten down?

BED.

time for bed. up at 6am to start the process all over again.

the american dream?