Jack Tait awoke from a two year bender. he was naked and alone. still stuck in his rundown farmhouse in the middle of nowhere. his one nut wrinkled and sagging to the ground. his other nut chopped off many years ago. Jack woke up and then stood up. his head pounding. his face wrinkled and dry. his mouth pasty and sick. a bender that started with one beer two years ago ended with a bloody face and bloody eyes. the last memory was the last sip of his last bottle of Jack. there was much more that was put into lonely old Jack Tait’s mouth that night but sometimes blackouts are a good thing.
Jack Tait stumbled to the shitty bathroom in his shitty house and sat on his shitty toilet. he released two years worth of loneliness and struggle into the water below. it was dark. it was dirty. it was smelly. it was as sad as he was. as sad as he is. he stood up to wipe his ass but there was no paper. never any toilet paper when Jack needed it. sort of like people. when you need them they are not there but when you don’t want them they are always there.
Jack Tait turned on the shower and stumbled in. it was cold. his large penis shrinking and clinging next to his shrinking ball. everything sagging. even confidence. Jack Tait bent over and let the cold water wipe his dirty ass and then he turned off the water. he grabbed his dirty towel that was on the dirty floor and wiped his dirt body. everything dirty. everything old. everything dark. but Jack Tait was alive. there is always something to be grateful for amidst the chaos of his shitty life. “ALWAYS LOOK AT THE BRIGHT SIDE OF LIFE.”
Jack Tait stumbled out of the cold bathroom and opened up his fridge. NOTHING. he looked outside. NOTHING. he opened the cupboards. NOTHING. he wanted something but had NOTHING. NOTHING IN LIFE AND NOTHING IN DEATH. was he dead? he was asleep for two years but NOT DEAD. He walked to his front door and opened it up. he stood naked for everyone to see but there was NO ONE there. just his lonely blue tricycle. cold and wet.
“HELLOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO…IS ANYONE OUT THERE?????????????”
No one answered. they never do. never did. Jack Tait walked back inside and sat down on his shitty purple reclining chair. he felt something dig into his left nut. he looked below and saw a big album. on the front of it there were words written on it but sloppily written. it said, “FAMILY ALBUM.”
Jack Tait opened it up. there was first a poem. it was a poem about love. a poem about life. Jack Tait began to tear up. He turned the page and saw many black and white pictures. there were pictures of his Mom. pictures of his Dad. pictures of his cousins and aunts and uncles and also of his nana. these pictures were filled with life and enthusiasm. they were filled with real people living real lives. they were filled with smiles and booze and kisses and hugs. filled with family and filled with LOVE. Jack Tait then turned the page and saw more real pictures. more real people. more real life. so many real people. so many real smiles. so many real laughs. real hearts. real souls. Jack Tait continued to look and continued to turn. continued to feel. he saw pictures of his old home. his old friends. his old bike. his old hockey stick. everything was old but everything was real. he longed for the days of real people living real lives with real smiles and real conversation. real love. real laughs. real life and REAL LOSS.
Jack Tait stared straight into the eyes of his late great Dad. he wondered what exactly happened the night he died. he wondered if he was dead before he got to the hospital. he wondered what happened to all of his Dad’s old friends and he wondered what his Mom was like before his Dad died. he stayed focused on this one. on that one. “WHAT WAS MOM LIKE? WHAT WAS MOM LIKE? SHE MUST HAVE BEEN HAPPY AS SHE HAD A LOVING HUSBAND AND TWO GREAT KIDS. SHE MUST HAVE BEEN HAPPY. SHE WAS PRETTY. I KNOW THAT SHE WAS PRETTY. BUT WAS SHE LOVING? I THINK SHE WAS LOVING. I HOPE SHE WAS LOVING. WAS SHE ZAPPED OF ALL HER LOVE AND AFFECTION WHEN HER HUSBAND AND THE LOVE OF HER LIFE SUDDENLY DIED ON THE GYM FLOOR OF CASSANDRA PUBLIC SCHOOL? MOM ARE YOU OUT THERE???? I WANT TO SEE YOU. I WANT TO FEEL YOU. I WANT TO FEEL YOUR LOVE AND SEE YOUR BEAUTY. MOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM!!!!!!!!!!! WHERE ARE YOU????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????????I MISS YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!”
Jack Tait quietly closed the book and looked down at his one sagging ball. he was dying a slow death and he knew it but didn’t know what to do. STUCK. JACK TAIT IS ALWAYS STUCK.
sad.
he walked outside naked and alone and hopped on his blue tricycle. he rode quickly down his long barren driveway. it was dark and dreary. he looked to the right and saw nothing. he looked to the left and saw nothing. he felt his long lost dog beside him staring at him the way his long lost dog used to stare at him when he jerked off or fucked. someone always watching. Jack Tait always watching himself.
Jack Tait rode to the end of his driveway and turned right. he was crying.
“DAD? MOM? ALEX? SARAH? TAYLOR? I AM COMING TO FIND YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!”
“I MISS YOU. YOU ARE ALL REAL. IN A FAKE WORLD YOU ARE REAL.”
Jack Tait continued to ride. continued to cry. continued to die. a slow death in a slow and dull town.
Jack Tait is alive and well…sort of.
notanotherphony. 