took adderall again today after speaking with my doctor. i have been feeling great without it but she seems to think that i overexaggerate my side effects so i don’t have to take them. she may be right. “i will try again your master.”
i am working on my belief in myself.
i am working on my confidence.
i am working on my beliefs and convictions.
i will try adderall again for a full month and then decide. she may be right.
i had a great therapy session yesterday and despite the fact that my therapist is so hot i managed to stay focused and stay on point. she had some great observations after i rambled for half an hour. the ying and yang of my life. i am fully free at times and happy and joyful and not worried at all what people think of me but then, at times, i am so consumed with following rules made up by our authority figures. being perfect. fitting in. needing the approval of authority. this creates debilitating anxiety.
FULLY FREE OR DEBILITATING ANXIETY.
such a great observation. so bang on. it must be hard to be taken so seriously when one is so pretty. so sexy. so attractive.
she is a great therapist.
back to the breath.
back to meditation.
back to relaxation.
the answers lie in “who i am.”
beneath the masks.
beneath the exterior.
beneath the noise.
WHO AM I?
LISTEN TO MYSELF.
HAVE BELIEFS.
HAVE CONVICTIONS.
RISK NOT BEING LIKED.
PURPOSE.
DO NOT BE PERFECT.
BE ME.
BE FREE.
notanotherphony. 