Jack Tait visits a doctor.

Jack Tait decided it was time to visit a doctor again.  he hadn’t been to a doctor for forty years.  the last time he went he was given Prozac and told to relax and stop fighting.  “you have anger issues son.”  Jack Tait didn’t trust doctors but he wanted to live for another hundred years so he felt he should go.  so he went.  he walked nakedly into the doctor’s office and sat patiently.  crying babies.  old hags.  rude men.  geeky boys.  stuck up girls who were ugly but acted as if they were hot.  all the misfits in a single room. Jack sat and stared.  everyone afraid to look at Jack.  “Jack Tait…this way please.”  naked Jack stood up and walked toward the lady announcing his name.  she was old and unnattractive.  “wait here and the doctor will be in shortly.”  Jack nodded and sat on the thin paper on the table.  he waited and waited.  twenty-five minutes later a beautiful female doctor walked into the room.  “hi my name is dr. seaman.  please turn around and i am going to shove two fingers up your bum to see if you have any lumps.”  Jack smiled and turned to the side as if he were about to pump a girl sideways.  this was Jack’s favourite position.  dr. seaman put vaseline on her two fingers and jammed hard.  this brought Jack back to his youth when he would stick fisher price toys up his bum.  his favourite was the yellow handle attached to a monkey.  JACK LOVED THAT ONE.  Jack was really horny as a youth.  still is.  Jack smiled.  dr. seaman pulled out.  she suddenly left the room.  Jack was horny.  he began hammering his twelve inch penis.  he knew that he shouldn’t but he couldn’t stop himself.  Jack was impulsive.  he hammered and hammered.  he was sweating.  he was smiling.  he was moaning.  he was dizzy.  he was thirsty.  BOOM.  EXPLOSION OF WHITENESS ONTO HIS LEFT HAND.  dr. seaman entered and looked at Jack.  Jack looked back.  silence.  Jack sweating more profusely.  Jack looked at dr. seaman’s blouse and noticed a missing button right where her boobies were.  “you’re missing a button.  i’m not really looking but i thought i should tell you.”  “thanks Jack.  how thoughtful.”  Jack still holding huge amounts of cum in his left hand.  “did you need a tissue?”  “yes please.”  dr. seaman handed Jack a tissue and Jack cleaned up.  he threw the tissue with cum in it in the garbage pail.  he smiled at dr. seaman.  “is that it?”  he asked.  “yes,” she replied.  Jack walked out of the office and through the waiting room.  he still had a big smile on his face.  all the peasants in the waiting room still afraid to look at Jack.  Jack’s twelve inch penis now two inches.  he walked to the elevator and pushed the button.  the elevator arrived and Jack got on.  there were mirrors everywhere and Jack saw how ugly and old he was.  he also saw how bald he was.  wrinkled.  weathered.  he knew life was precious and so he took every single moment as a learning experience.  he also wanted to connect with people.  he was more free now than when he was young and vibrant.  he knew most people wasted their lives with hang ups and insecurities and chasing money and chasing girls.  he once hated those people but now Jack felt empathy.  he knew other kids jammed fisher price toys up their bums.  he knew girls wanted to but they were so afraid of what boys would think of them that they didn’t.  he knew that life was meant to be lived and to engage with people and to have fun but he saw most people suffer through boredom and political correctness.  Jack Tait walked off the elevator and through the hallway and back out onto the street.  it was sunny.  he unlocked his blue tricycle and started pedalling.  he rode and rode.  for hours and hours.  up hills.  down hills.  through parks.  through stop signs.  through traffic lights.  five hours later he made it back to his spot.  a deserted farmhouse in Keswick, Ontario.
  Jack Tait placed his bicycle on the dirty ground.  he sat quietly.  he found his bottle of Jack Daniels and started chugging.  he puked.  he drank some more.  he started screaming.  “HEEEEEEEEEEEEELP ME!!!  HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELP ME!!!  HEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELP ME!!!”  no one came.  Jack grabbed a few stones and threw them on the dirt.  he then went to bed.  he was tired.  Jack Tait is sixty years old.