another beautiful grey day outside. cool. damp. windy. head still foggy even though i drank less last night and went to bed early.
sitting on a patio in a plaza. body tingling. back to school tomorrow. Rylee’s last year of high school. she’s such a great kid. she’s overcome many obstacles and encountered many buffoons. but she is resilient. her parents (us) always in a state of mental health issues. nicole letting me “in” yesterday. vulnerable. open. honest. love. that’s all i ever ask for. openness. honesty. vulnerability. who gives a flying fuck about big houses and big cars? i just want a life filled with great communication and great wine. great love. great talks. life can be so beautiful if we would only just get out of our own way.
so much beauty in the world.
so much joy.
so much pain.
so much love.
so much phoniness.
so much inspiration.
connect with joyful people.
connect with authentic people.
connect with inspirational people.
STAY AWAY FROM PHONIES.
back sore. must have tweaked it running. too much weight equals sore knees and sore back. i’m always torn between letting go and FUCKING EVERYTHING and focusing with complete discipline and complete health. healthy eating. healthy sleeping. healthy drinking. healthy exercise.
the problem with mental health is that when you are aware of your mental health issues and mired in “fixing yourself” there is NEVER an end game. books after books. psychotherapists after psychotherapists. yoga. meditation. daily affirmations. daily tea.
so much time is fixated on fixing yourself that you never have time to live your life. never relax. never fully “let go” and be free and say “FUCK IT. LET’S GO!!!”
stuck in people pleasing. stuck in worrying about what other’s think. stuck in past failures. past abuses. past scrapes. past bruises. past. STUCK IN THE PAST.
why do we get STUCK in the negatives of the past instead of the positives?
LIFE 101.
notanotherphony. 