life and love. loss?

my uncle died today and i don’t feel much.

i don’t feel sad.

i don’t feel relief.

i don’t feel happy.

i haven’t seen him in about ten years. he was a large part of my life when my dad died in 1978 but since then i don’t remember having much of a relationship. he was my dad’s brother but i don’t even think they were particularly close. family is weird that way. you are born into a family and you grow up with that family and then you meet your relatives and you are expected to get along with all of them and like all of them or even love all of them. i haven’t been close with my aunts and uncles and cousins for a long time. if not for facebook i wouldn’t have a clue about any of their lives. odd. life continues on for all of us. life continues on for myself and my immediate family. we all, eventually, die. we mourn for a few days and then we all move on. tragedy is different. unexpected death is different. unexpected death and unexpected life. unexpected diseases. wars kill people. kill innocent children. innocent women. innocent men. why do we support war? why do we support war? why do we support war?

BRAINWASHED.

BRAINWASHED.

BRAINWASHED.

i’ll continue to heal.

i’ll continue to breathe.

i’ll continue to listen.

listen to my heart.

listen to my soul.

GROUPS ARE DANGEROUS.

GROUP THINKING IS DANGEROUS.

critical thinking is rare.

a free spirit is rare.

why do some people NOT want to heal?

hiding.

hoping.

crying.

yelling.

blaming.

avoiding.

sleeping.

pretending.

the dreaded “ings” of FEAR.