notanotherphony.

each day is a new opportunity to live.

each day is a new opportunity to grow.

each day is a new opportunity to learn.

each day is a new opportunity to love.

each day is a new opportunity to impact someone.

each day is a new opportunity to find your purpose. find a purpose.

each day is a new opportunity to affect people.

each day is a new opportunity to start a business.

each day is a new opportunity to start my business.

i wonder why so many people get stuck in jobs that they can’t stand and don’t pay them enough money to really enjoy their lives?

i wonder why people get stuck in relationships that are toxic and dull and uninspiring?

i wonder why there are still wars going on in this world killing so many innocent people?

why does the media give a “pass” to benjamin netanyahu and his armies sickening attack on innocent palestinian lives?

when so many people in the world have called for a ceasefire and so many people in the world have called his act a genocide why have other leaders NOT stepped in to stop the senseless killings?

TWO WRONGS NEVER MAKE A RIGHT!!!

who determines gas prices and why do they fluctuate so much?

politicians (DRUMPF) talk about spending billions and billions of dollars on various agendas and causes BUT they never solve the issue of poverty. why not?

POVERTY IN AMERICA.

news coverage???

it’s dark outside.

6am.

monday morning blues but i no longer get the monday morning blues. my weekends are NOT filled with fun and excitement.

more work.

more dread.

more stress.

i am, actually, excited for mondays so i can make money. i can no longer afford days off.

the adderall seems to be working. i am more focused and more hopeful due to the increased focus.

i am on a low dose of 5mg.

i should try upping my dose to 10mg this week.

i always worry about the side effects when the drug wears off later in the day.

bad headaches.

face pulsating.

face flushed.

but desperate times call for desperate measures.

innovation in technology has brought about less humanity. more phoniness. more plastic product. less human product.

less heart.

less soul.

i refuse to buy in.

i refuse to buy in to fake and phony. fake and phony people delivering fake and phony product.

FUCK THEM.

be real.

be honest.

be human.

listen and love.

love and listen.

fuck if you want to but don’t hurt people.

connect with people NOT devices.

another day and another opportunity to bring positivity to the world.

another day to bring positivity to people.

we have one life to live.

I NEED TO REMEMBER THAT.

cold outside.

early morning.

cloudy.

cold.

september 7th.

time for change.

time for action.

time for energy.

time to shine.

i’ve always loved the cooler weather. the cooler weather excites me or gets me excited. not sweating. not muggy. the crisp air brings about an energy. brings about an excitement. it is the calm before the storm. but i love winter too.

i miss my daughter.

i know that she is thriving out west but i miss her.

i feel that i never did spend enough quality time with her. i never really cherished our moments together. i never really was there for her the way a dad should be there for his daughter. i miss her now. family has always been intriguing to me. i’ve known my mom for fifty-seven years and, yet, i really don’t know anything about her life. what was her childhood like? what were her teen years like? what was school like? how were her parents? did she have many boyfriends or just a few solid ones? did she have solid ones? did she travel the world? did she struggle? did she experience trauma in her youth? did she experience trauma before experiencing the traumatic events of February 17, 1978 when her husband and my dad died? where did she meet my dad? what type of kid was she? introverted? extroverted? smart? funny? quirky? loving? caring? empathetic? when was her first kiss? who was it with? when was her first sexual encounter? who was it with? there is so much that i do not know and, yet, i have known my mom longer than anyone in the whole world? my world.

time for change.

time for change.

time to connect.

time to love.

time to listen.

time to heal.

TIME IS RUNNING OUT.

TIME.

still not enough money to live.

money in.

money out.

bills.

bills.

bills.

rising food costs.

stagnant wages.

no security.

no planning.

constantly begging.

still sick but no answers.

eating healthier?

exercising more?

sore body.

sore mind.

sore bank account.

stress.

stress.

stress.

long term covid perhaps?

eyes burning.

stuffy nose.

chest cough.

headache.

tired.

tired.

tired.

I WANT TO BREAK FREE.

a beautiful day outside.

my mind is constantly in overdrive trying to navigate the economics of life.

bad decisions early on have left me scrambling now.

as i get older i have less and less money. less and less options to make money.

depressing.

do pills help?

does therapy help?

is there anyone out there who can help?

commitments for nothing and your checks for free.

free?

freedom?

does life just work out at some point?

lots of people.

lots of love.

lots of loss.

lots of stress.

lots of hope?

lost hope?